Sadly, I'm the one in blue.
1. I wanna explain the circumstances but there's really nothing I can say that will make this better. It would only make it slightly less worse. I'm wearing bedsheets AND pillowcases. Just like the Native Americans, I used all parts of the bed linen. And a tiara. And I'm clearly too old/not a bed for all of those things.
2. Alright so obviously, we're dressed as ladies of Elizabethan England. That is obvious right? Oh god, it's not is it? We're just weirdos on a porch wearing bedsheets for no discernible reason.
3. I orchestrated this event as a project for my 7th grade English class when we were reading Taming of the Shrew. I think the parameters of the project were very open-ended so CLEARLY I took some artistic liberties. Namely, I forced my little sister and my cousin to wrap themselves in bedsheets and pillowcases, be filmed for my English class, talk in fake British accents and then I made Gracie rub actual dirt on her face so she looked like an authentic "groundling." I was very concerned with authenticity, obviously. Naturally, I was a member of the aristocracy (hence, the tiara). And then I willingly PLAYED THIS MOVIE FOR MY ENTIRE CLASS. Miraculously, I still had friends afterwards. Perhaps not surprisingly, I did not have a steady boyfriend at this time or any times prior to or directly after this.
4. I also played the parts of both Romeo and Juliet (the balcony scene, obvi) by filming myself and changing my clothes back and forth after every line so it appeared as though I were speaking to myself.
5. Absolute ridiculousness aside, can we all agree that these outfits were actually incredibly crafty? Like, dang 7th grade Annie, you were a major dork but at least a resourceful one.
Let's never speak of this again.